Tag: happiness

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The Rage Within: Violence It Shouldn’t Exist But Would Our World Function Without It?

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Rage, anger, violence, and/or wrath, whatever one would call their snapped moment or moments when they commit such heinous acts against others. Where does it all steam from? Has anyone every stopped and think to themselves why does anger exist? I mean I know everything is supposed to be balance hence the reason for happiness. But do we really have enough happiness to balance out the anger? Even if we are talking collectively versus individually. Is there a balance I mean a truly even balance?

Let’s think about it for a minute. If one compares how easy it is for them to get upset over something small versus how long it takes them to build up their happiness. Can we really say there is enough happiness to balance out or offset the rage that run rampant in the world? Or is that there is enough happiness and positive endorphins going around but social media just won’t let us be great? I personally believe that there are a lot people around who are truly happy but it is just their surroundings and things that we consume on social media. It is a lot easier for individuals to be unhappy when they are in a state of consist struggle.

Rather that struggle is paying bills, dealing with kids, your spouse, or spouse(s) for those of you who are bold, it can be very easy to sway a person into anger. Think about it, if you are doing something that makes you happy once or a couple of times of week. Then those days that you are holding on and looking forward to the next adrenaline rush of pure pleasure, it can be easy to get upset over small things. It’s almost like getting high on Mary Jane. If MJ calms you down and relaxes you then you are probably tense and anxious until you get your next hit. Now factor days and hours into the mix in between your relaxations. One can understand the reasons for anyone for just snapping.

Now I’m not saying everyone should go and get high or that may be the answer to your actions. But there are other fixes that can calm a person down. Such as yoga, working out, running, eating, cooking, painting, writing, the list goes on. Finding a niche and sticking with it can make a big difference in a person being calm all day or being on 1st 48. And believe me no one wants to see someone they now on America’s Most Wanted, First 48 Hours, Snapped, the news, or any of those Investigate Discovery shows. Sometimes I often wonder is it just as contagious as getting a cold. The risks are high with none to little reward in most cases. Not to mention the effects it has on your health and appearance.

I grew up being taught that my face would get stuck in a certain look if I didn’t remove the facial expression. But yet here I am 30+ years later and I still have frowns on my face. Mainly because I didn’t believe them and my face still hasn’t gotten stuck. Sometimes I wonder where a lot of the old wives tales come from before they were told to me. But that’s for another day. The real question is would the world truly be able to function without the emotion of rage? I mean what will that world look like and if it did exist is it safe to say that no one would be annoyed by the fact that everyone would be happy and living their best life.

But there is something major missing in this discussion. Religion, would it even exist since world wouldn’t technically need something to believe in since anger wouldn’t exist? Let’s think about it, religion is here to assist those of us who allow worldly things to get to us and we need our weekly fix in our belief in order to function properly. Some of us need to not flash out of every person and be irritate. Now that would be a very interesting world. Can you imagine no anger, no religion, no checks and balances of the mind, and no police and or people to cause catastrophic results. Actually the world would be shameful, pitiful, and a mute. So I can say that a little chaos is good just not overboard with it like we’re seeing today.

So in conclusion it is safe to say that violence is necessary in order to keep those in jobs, bringing about religion, allowing one to say thank you and learn from their mistakes. In other words wrath is needed to balance out humanity so that we don’t have enough plain janes around us. Beside happiness is born out of the chaos that is provided and vic versa.

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Inside Thoughts: My Personal Entry 1

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So I think something is mentally wrong with me. I have the nate desire to protect and be overbearing of my family. For some reason I have these visions or visual dreams of all types of bad things that can happen to my family. Especially, for the men, my son and husband. In this world the thoughts of what can happen can be so scary and horrific to the point that it will scare one to stay in doors at all times. But when the mind plays tricks on you even your home becomes a scary domain.

So to combat this fear I pray. I simply just pray the visions away and the bad drama that can occur. I do believe in the law of attraction, therefore, thinking that something terrible can happen will allow something to happen. And I’m just not up for that, I cannot handle the possibilities. So I pray the thoughts away and replace them with great thoughts of old age and happiness. Thoughts of wealth within and outward no matter the economic status.

So for every dark dream or vision, I replace each with the double vision of happiness and what is to come. Without giving doubt that the happiness will prevail and put the horrible visions far out of my mind. Preparing for when they come back. If even a small hint of darkness creeps up, I just pray and redirect my thoughts.

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Happiness Comes From Within Not Social Media

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The cost of trying to be famous for millennials is not worth selling all of your being. Like bro and sis it is not worth it in the end or the near future. Let’s look at the statistics, how many wealthy people can actually say they are truly happy with their life? I can tell you right now money cannot buy happiness but yes it can solve problems but mo’ money also means mo’ problems. There is more at stake when you have it all boo- ski believe me. Just think about, when you are at the bottom of the economic status you don’t have as much to loose as someone who has built an entire empire and is sitting at the top of the economic pyramid. At any moment they can fall to the bottom alongside you. The only difference between someone with wealth and someone without wealth is the amount of resources that come to you willingly.

Yes, that is the only difference… the resources. Because someone who has “it all,” will have all those who also have it all (and who don’t) trying to get to the hot topic of a person who is new on the scene. But what they don’t show you is when that person is no longer the new kid on the block and they are no longer the sought out after person. Have you ever notice that celebrities who don’t do something drastic every year will soon fade into the background and eventually you forget about them. Well, real life works the same boo. From your job, to church (yes church), sports, social life, you name it. Trying to be the best in all that you do is exhausting. Now I’m not saying striving for your best if that’s what you truly want, is a waste. Only do this if it comes naturally and if it brings you happiness. Some people literally thrive on competition and competitiveness. And that is cool boo boo for you. But some of us can only run on that fuel for so long. Some need a schedule and to carve out time in a day, week, or month. But regardless, finding your self worth is way more rewarding than trying to be glorified and glamourous for social media. See when you know your self worth and then try to be just yourself. You will attract the fame that you were not looking for along with wealth. And when that happens you are now working on your time instead of racing to please everyone else and stay in the spotlight.

Millennials we need to stop looking to social media for validation for our lives. To be honest if you’re not focusing on your self worth and internal wealth then man you’re going to lose and these devastating suicides and homicides will never stop or slow down. I mean with social media being the validation of the “it person,” it’s kind of hard for one to know how to validate themselves. To be honest it isn’t hard, start with meditating, reading, exercising (yes exercise), surround yourself with happy motivating people, seek out positive mentors, go to comedy clubs, volunteer, anything that can be beneficial to your well-being. Material things can only bring temporary happiness which means you still will fill empty if you’re not fulfilled mentally.

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Beauty in the Eye of the Beholder, Misery Loves Company

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They say beauty is in the eye of the beholder…but what if the beholder is you? Can you honestly say to yourself everyday that you love what you see…unconditionally? If you answered no to either of those questions than you need to re-evaluate your way of thinking. And realize you’re not the only one but there is hope, all is not lost my friend.

Now just because you’re not alone in this self love imagery, doesn’t mean that it is okay to seek love from others around you or go looking for it. See that’s not how love works. One has to really be okay and utilize all those features that either you don’t like or that everyone makes fun, and make it an advantage rather than a hindrance. That saying that beauty is in the eye of the beholder, needs to also say that you are the beholder. In this day and age being picked on and bullied doesn’t end at school it can also transpire over social media and the web. It is so easy for children and young adults to feel down and depressed because there is no off switch to the chaos. One can feel like their world is crumbling and life is better without them. And that is just sad and miserable.

But there is also another saying that people seem to forget…misery loves company. And since everyone is pumping out more misery it is easy for them to select those who just can’t catch a break and add to their suffering. Wow how self centered and pathetic we have gotten as a society to think that pain and suffering is enjoyable and will erase that whole in your heart. Confidence, compassion, love, self worth, and others are at an alarming low every time I look at my phone. I can only imagine how those who are still in grade school must feel. I mean the mass shootings and young adult/children suicide numbers should tell us something. But for people who are so consumed by our own world that we don’t even realize that the world doesn’t evolve around us, we evolve around it.

But there is a bright side…like all things that are bad there are opposites or ying and yang. Just like you wake up and feel depressed, lonely, heartless, worthless, etc you can also feel joy, love, compassion, self love, etc. and have everything that is sugar, spice, and nice (you see my rhymes…mad skills yo…lol). You know how you can get that awesome feeling? Just guess…come on think. Practice…what practice, practice what you say. Self love. Yes, start by practicing self love first and everything else will fall into place. See right now those who are preying on you are doing it because you don’t love yourself enough to not allow small or petty things like bullying bother you. You have to set your eyes on the prize… your future and what you’re going to be doing with it. Someone who is focused and driven about what they want in life doesn’t have time to worry about someone who is miserable and trying to add to that misery by including you. Yes, I know there are other forms of bullying like the physical portion but I’m referring to the mental part.

If your mind, spirit, and love for yourself is strong then instead of feeling hurt by others you will realize that you feel sorry for them and keep it moving. Now in order to practice self love you first have to remove yourself from the negative environment so that you can meditate and think for yourself. Not the dark thoughts but the happy thoughts of what could and will be of your dreams. You cannot allow others to control your emotions. Unplug and detox social media and socializing if you have to, so that you can have those moments to yourself. Once you start rationalizing and looking at things and situations in a different light you will soon see that there are other alternatives besides shooting, killing, harming yourself and others. Seek out knowledge and read books to engulf your thoughts and imagination to a place of happiness and then try to apply some of those feelings of self love outward. So yes, beauty is in the eye of the beholder and that beholder is you. Don’t let anyone try to stump on happiness and depress your soul. Lead by example and be extraordinary.

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To My Son: The Promises I Make to You

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As father’s day draws near and the day that you will once again be in my arms; I just wanted to take the time to write this. If over the years you feel discourage in my capabilities as a mother to you. Or you feel at any point I have failed you. Know that I did my best and most importantly I LOVE You more than anything the universe could ever offer me. Everything that I accomplished in life is nothing compared to bringing you into this world. Even though this world will do a lot of damage, please never give up and remember all the good things in life. Especially, those who truly love you… God and your parents. Yes, there will be times where you question everything in life. But I promise there is always light after the darkness. With that being said…

I will promise to do my best at all times to being a great parent to you.
I promise to provide you with what you need and strive for what you want.
I promise to be your backup when you are in the right and just.
I promise to guide you when you are lost.
I promise to protect your heart and soul from the evils of the world until you are strong enough to guard them yourself.
I promise to love you until the end of time.
I promise to give you the tools you need to survive and strive and conquer the world.

To my baby boy, my third pregnancy, my first born, to my blessing, I most importantly promise to be your mom.

Love Always,
Mom

Thanks for reading…. SimplyBetty101

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Random Thought…JUMP and Take the RISK

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Why are you so scared to jump? Starting something new isn’t going to be easy and you may not have the support that you are used to. But ask yourself these questions

1. What can you sacrifice?
2. Can you live with that decision?
3. What scares you about this decision?
4. Is it worth your happiness for the rest of your life/ is the decision based on the betterment for you?

Yes, taking a leap of faith on yourself to pursue something that has always been a dream is scary and maybe dangerous. But do you want to be one of those people who always wondered what life would’ve been like? Or do you want to say I tried and conquered. Or maybe you didn’t conquer but it took you on a different route to satisfaction. No one can decide your life but yourself. And yes you may lose those you hold and cherish, but if they cannot support or understand, did they really cherish you? Don’t be surprise if those you look up such as family, best friend, or even ideals walk away or discourage you. Everything will come full circle and life will proceed with or without them. Look even if you’re doing things to help others, wouldn’t you be in a better position to help those if you were happy?

Think about it….SimplyBetty101

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Transitioning….?

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What if your transitioning into a new you whether it’s for work, new home, parenthood, or just phasing out if the party life. What is now the new norm for you? What else fun is there to do that is more your speed?

I’m currently going through that transitioning as I type this up. Now that I am married, a parent, and focused more on my career of being my own boss. Things that use to interest me just don’t do it for me anymore. The fact that I am more excited to buy decor and furniture for our new place than for me to go out and party, is way more exciting. Like a kid in a candy store excited. Going to family events and being in a calm environment that’s more controlled and stable is wonderful. Don’t get me wrong I love a good turnup just like the next person but only on my own terms with like minded people as well. When you surround yourself with people that are also transitioning, you find that very similar bond and growth that you may just need. A support group. This also means new friends.

But if you can transition with those you have been friends with it can be an awesome feeling and experience. But if you can’t, don’t give up so easily. So just because you are now in a different space than those you cherish doesn’t mean you have to abandon them. Try coaching or encouraging them to get on your level or higher. You may be surprised at what you find. Sometimes people just need others to lead so that they can fall suit. Not all leaders start off as leaders and not all followers will stay followers.

Thanks SimplyBetty101

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Over-staying Your Welcome

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So today I was wondering how long have I been here at my cousins house? Even though I’m only staying here to find a place for my own family, I was hoping that it would be a quick 2 to 3 day stay. But thinking on it I have been here a full 7 day week. Though I know she doesn’t mind I feel like I’m being a leech. Which is why I hope she never sees this post…lol the amount of killer eye she will give me is undeniable.

Look I appreciate the help and guidance but if I was in her position there is a limit for me. Now by no means am I one if those family members who doesn’t help nor clean up behind themselves. I have been fussed at for cleaning the kitchen and putting a trash bag in the trash can. Not that is was a real “don’t touch nothing,” her house is ran under certain rules. Also not to mention she is a bit OCD, she likes things done a certain way. And this is where my understanding comes in.

If it were me I do appreciate the help and love the company but at some point I would want to get back to my regular scheduled program of how I like my house ran. Children are still in school here which means they have rules on a daily basis and one cannot come in and throw off that schedule. One must be in stealth mode at all times and go with the flow. All while trying not to upset the balance of everyday life. And still be comfortable to do what I need for my family as well. I like the idea of being in the house with a kitchen that has love and laughter. But I also know that it is not my house and this is what I’m looking for. I love the uncoditional love and support my family provides but there comes a time when a girl just wants some alone time. Especially before hubby gets here.

So with that being said, people if you are staying with a friend or relative please understand body language and don’t over stay your welcome. Especially if your able to stay somewhere else. Now if you are in desperate need, then your circumstances are different. But please be less of a burden as possible. And if you just have that family that loves company then this does not apply to you as well. As always thanks for reading … SimplyBetty101

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Moving In and On: House and Career Dreams

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Looking for a change in life? Rather you’re looking to transition to a beautiful new home, career, or both remember not all transitions are easy. And not all will be on your timeline either. Don’t get discourage. Look at it as a challenge or hurdle that you have to move out of your way.

Not every door will open when you want it to and not all doors lead you to where you expect. Somethings have to be taken with a blind leap of faith and persistence. Think of life as a child that doesn’t listen all of the time. With children you will have to have the patience of a person who has all the time in the world and have your anger in check at all times. Plus you also have to keep explaining and instructing children to do what you need. The same rules apply to your potential home or career. Children are put into our lives to test us and the world has the same code of life. It’s all just a test that you will ace. Yes you may have to take the test multiple times until you pass it but you’ll get there. So don’t be discourage when someone is trying to block a blessing from you. Remember whatever is for you no man can take from you no matter how hard they try.

Thanks for reading… SimplyBetty101

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Dear Mr. Forever I Promise 2 You: My Vows

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Today is finally here, after 10 years of ups and downs, war wounds, and the greatest part of my life thus far. I just wanted to say that even though I have expressed and shown you love throughout the years writing this was a bit exciting.

There’s not a day that goes by that I don’t think about you even when we’re together. There’s not a day where I don’t get excited to hear your voice or to look into those dark brown eyes. You have pushed me, supported me, and cared for me at my lowest time. We have lost so much but gained more than we could ever imagine as a unit. Where most people would’ve just given in and wanted us to just move on from each other we stayed because we saw something in each other that no one else could.

Yes I nag and complain a lot but what girl who is spoiled doesn’t? And where would the fun be if I just complied to everything. And we both know that’s not my nature. You are my better half and challenge me to be my best. I love your selflessness and your ability to see the dream with me. On this special day 10 years ago I challenged you to tell me what this was and you answered well I guess we’re a relationsfip and ended the convoy with saying L word. Even then we knew that we loved each other and that this would be forever. As the song says you make me better… I love you…