Tag: husband

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Mr. Right and the Universe

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Hey you reading this blog hoping that some type of advice will just appear to help you find a husband (Mr. Right), please stop looking. And here’s why

  1. Looking for Mr. Right or husband is only going to attract Mr. Wrong or as I like to call him Mr. Right for right now. Yes, he will seem like he’s God sent but keep him around long enough and you will realize that he is the devil in disguise.
  2. Beware everything that looks good is not always good for you. Some men will prey on women’s vulnerability of being wanted just so they can cash in. I know you have heard of the term gold digger that men use when they’re being cautious of women, well the same applies to women as well. There are men out there wanting to be taken care of like their children.
  3. Watch out for the empty promises. Anytime a man always tells you what he’s going to do but never or rarely follows up with a plan or actually doing what he promised. Run sis because you’ll be left out holding the bill. Even if he acts like he attempted. If he is only coming through on the small promises that’s just to keep you around long enough.
  4. 90% right 10% wrong. If you have a man that you think is your dream man but there is still something about him that makes you second guess. You better listen to that 10% because it is just for show.
  5. Make sure your gut, mind, and spirit are in align when going forward. There are always tell tell signs that something or he is wrong make sure you are paying attention and heeding the warnings.
  6. Also keep in mind he may just be Mr. Right just not right now. People have to grow into the person that they are meant to be. And they may be the person that is meant to be with you but they still have some growing to do. And that goes for you as well. It also doesn’t mean that you have to hold on to one another until that transformation takes place either. If it is meant to be it will happen just give it the proper time and trials and tribulations that one must go through to get there.

Hopefully, this helps you realize your mistakes and maturity level and understand that everybody is not for you or against you. We all have to seek clarity in ourselves in order to receive what is meant for us. When the time is right the universe will align in our favor but not before that.

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Black Parent’s Fear: Raising a Child in America Part 2

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It’s a beautiful day today, maybe we should have a cookout in the park.  My 6’3″ husband with his sexy dark chocolate skin and shoulder length dreads put our more handsome dark almond son in his seat.  I pack the food and everything we would need into our car nevermind the make and model, it shouldn’t be important.  Or should it?  Because I’m also slightly tall standing at 5’7″ with almond long legs.  I know that beautiful bundle of joy that I carried for 40 weeks is a target.  I can’t help but fear for him every time he is out of my sight.  Just like I know my husband’s mother probably shouldn’t worry about both of her tall sons but in the back of her mind she does.  It’s strange to me know knowing the biggest fear I had in life was having a son.  And even though I can’t live without him the fears and anxiety I have about his future is very real.

Everyday I turn on my phone and there it is on my social media timelines about someone being attacked or killed for the color of their skin.  All because of the assumption that the opposite race had of them.  What has become of America?  Has it always been this violent and we as people didn’t have much light shed on it because of social media?  Is it a curse and a blessing to have so much information at our fingertips?  But what if we didn’t have the resources?  Would the danger still be this real or we just more oblivious to it?  I can’t help but wonder is there a better place in the world to raise a brown skin family?

No I don’t want my son living in a world where so much hatred exist for other human beings as if no one’s life matters but our own.  He’s a toddler now and everyday I question my thoughts on how to explain race issues and when.  When would it be a good time to sit my handsome son down and explain to him what is going on in this world and to be mindful of his surroundings at all times?  Questions such as, should I wait till he experiences this issue or will that be too late for his precious life.  The mere thought of living life without my child or worst having to bury him before my time is up is horrifying.  No parent should have to worry about these things at any point in their lives.  Only the thoughts of proms, graduations, weddings, and every other exciting milestone should be in a parents thought.  The fact that I have anxiety attacks that send me to my knees in pray whenever my husband leaves the house is no good for my health nor thoughts.  But this is America.

I know if I constantly think in this way then I have allowed those who try to insert fear and supremacy into people’s lives win.  But if I don’t think about the possibilities then I am just as a fool who thinks that nothing bad could happen to them.  I do believe in law of attraction, therefore, I do think about old age and prosperity anytime those evil thoughts creep into my mind.  I also think about alternatives to those horrible events to the point that I pray instantly and think of a better outcome.   So all hope is not lost and I know that my son will have a better future in America but for those that have and will go through tragedy.  There is always a light at the end of the tunnel you just have to keep moving.

 

Thanks…SimplyBetty101

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Transitioning….?

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What if your transitioning into a new you whether it’s for work, new home, parenthood, or just phasing out if the party life. What is now the new norm for you? What else fun is there to do that is more your speed?

I’m currently going through that transitioning as I type this up. Now that I am married, a parent, and focused more on my career of being my own boss. Things that use to interest me just don’t do it for me anymore. The fact that I am more excited to buy decor and furniture for our new place than for me to go out and party, is way more exciting. Like a kid in a candy store excited. Going to family events and being in a calm environment that’s more controlled and stable is wonderful. Don’t get me wrong I love a good turnup just like the next person but only on my own terms with like minded people as well. When you surround yourself with people that are also transitioning, you find that very similar bond and growth that you may just need. A support group. This also means new friends.

But if you can transition with those you have been friends with it can be an awesome feeling and experience. But if you can’t, don’t give up so easily. So just because you are now in a different space than those you cherish doesn’t mean you have to abandon them. Try coaching or encouraging them to get on your level or higher. You may be surprised at what you find. Sometimes people just need others to lead so that they can fall suit. Not all leaders start off as leaders and not all followers will stay followers.

Thanks SimplyBetty101

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Dear Mr. Forever I Promise 2 You: My Vows

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Today is finally here, after 10 years of ups and downs, war wounds, and the greatest part of my life thus far. I just wanted to say that even though I have expressed and shown you love throughout the years writing this was a bit exciting.

There’s not a day that goes by that I don’t think about you even when we’re together. There’s not a day where I don’t get excited to hear your voice or to look into those dark brown eyes. You have pushed me, supported me, and cared for me at my lowest time. We have lost so much but gained more than we could ever imagine as a unit. Where most people would’ve just given in and wanted us to just move on from each other we stayed because we saw something in each other that no one else could.

Yes I nag and complain a lot but what girl who is spoiled doesn’t? And where would the fun be if I just complied to everything. And we both know that’s not my nature. You are my better half and challenge me to be my best. I love your selflessness and your ability to see the dream with me. On this special day 10 years ago I challenged you to tell me what this was and you answered well I guess we’re a relationsfip and ended the convoy with saying L word. Even then we knew that we loved each other and that this would be forever. As the song says you make me better… I love you…