Should Marriages Have An Expiration Date Similiar to Driver’s License?

So I was questioned about a video that I did, Vlog; Should Marriages Have the Option to Expire Every 4 Years? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sbec1osyDIY. And basically I was asked about the effects about how a system like that should work and the countermeasures that should be in place due to the fact that people homes would be wrecked beyond repair. Now I am all for having a conversation about a hypothetical situation just as much as I love the discussion on real issues today. But this was a hypothetical proposal and was all opinionated. But I will entertain the situation and go more into details. And I would like to ask the question, is everything in today’s failed marriages fixed.

In other words, we cannot find a solution to every single problem in every single person’s life in the world. Think about, if there were solutions to everyone’s problems then there wouldn’t be so many inventions to make everyday tasks better, there wouldn’t be so many prescriptions written for the opioid crisis, there wouldn’t be so many psychiatrist and psychologist, doctors, teachers, and the list goes on. Hell there are solutions to some problems that we didn’t even know we had. But my point is there will always be a flaw in any new governmental law that is put into place. Especially for the ideas that have never been done before. We can’t talk about what if problems of a hypothetical law that will have an affect on families when the laws and customs that we have today also have effects on families now.

The only reason why this concept of having a marriage expire like a driver’s license came up was due to the fact the the divorce rate in the United States alone is about 40 to 50 percent. That’s literally saying that half of the people you know who are married have or will get a divorce. That is a shockingly high percentage. Especially on a country that pushes for family economical growth. Now financially for those whose careers flourish or profit off of divorces, I can understand why you may oppose the idea of a marriage expiring versus to going to divorce court. But if America was to every entertain the idea of marriages expiring it may actually have a better effect on people and their families. These long/short term marriages have devastating effects financially and mentally on the main parties involved.

Think about it, if two people who think they are in love and want to spend the rest of theirs lives together get married. But then find out the horrible truth let’s say 3 years into the marriage. Instead of paying thousands of dollars to get out of the marriage they can allow it to expire the following year without adding on the stress of financial burden. I mean if we look at states that recognize common law marriage we can say it’s kind of already into place. Of course, there are some restrictions or rules to the common law marriage but can technically be voided at anytime.

Temporary marriage/expiring marriage should work the same. If we went through the marriage process as normal, meeting someone, invested interest, intent on living til death do you part, building a family, etc. But found out sooner than later that it’s not going to work out then we should be able to walk away with the least amount of damage. Now in my opinion of this hypothetical temporary/expiring marriage I believe some rules and outcomes should be in place. For example:

  1. Obtain marriage license and get married as per requirements now
  2. Have the option to allow your marriage to be temporary/expire after 4 years
  3. If temporary/expire option has been chosen and couple decide to continue in marriage then court will deem marriage as full status or complete (whatever terminology decided)
  4. If couple decides to allow marriage to expire then couple will have to appear before judge stating that they will respectfully and agree that both parties should separate. This will allow families to not go bankrupt and have families be a bit more civil (again my opinion)

Now I know your thinking what about the effects it will have of career persons that have invested interest on marriages failing and the effects that it will have long and short term on children and family members. And to those facts I say unto you, how do you think families are doing now financially, emotionally, and mentally with divorce rates being high now. And those who are banking off failing marriages believe me just like everyone else who have fallen off the financial high wagon there will be other opportunities that arise within this suggestion that will allow them to be just fine. Just like any other careers that have been altered in the past due to major economic changes in America.

What would be so different with this adjustment. I do believe some people are so lazy and scared that instead of focusing their energy on being positive and coming up with a better game plan for when things hit the fan. They rather blame others and just sit there festering about how things were. Things change all the time across all spectrums and yet many of us still find ways to come out on top. But as stated this is a hypothetical situation that may never come into forewishion. But the concept or something similar may just work if the right thought and time was put into place to allow such an idea to prosper.

Surviving Your 1st Year a Marriage: It’s a Tough One But If You Make It Your Good

So you’re married and your anniversary is coming up…your 1st year of marriage is coming to a end. Surviving your 1st year is going to be crucial in how the remainder of your lives is going to play out. Granted if you and your spouse have been together for some years before you said your “I dos,” it may be slightly easier. Even if you have been together for a good minute the moment you say those vows you now have to re-introduce yourself as Mr. and Mrs. The title of marriage is another threshold that the world for some reason respects more than your single non changed name. But the only thing you need to remember about surviving that first year is the fundamentals of making it as a couple.

  1. Everything you do represents you as a couple. In other words you can no longer go out in public and act in any kind of way. Everything you do in public will also reflect your spouse. Now if you and your spouse act the same then as long as it makes both of you happy then keep on my friend and enjoy.
  2. You both have to exist in the same space. Normally, singles can just pick and go or leave at any point in the relationship. But once married you now have to strategically look at all outcomes of your decisions. Because those decisions can affect your partner and those in your household.
  3. Adjusting to marry life takes some getting use to. Now granted if you have been living together or cohabiting as some may call it. This may seem like an easy transition. But just like everything around you that evolves so does your relationship. You now have to think about bank accounts, name changes, being called Mr. or Mrs. on a regular, being able to make decisions legally on your spouse’s behalf. When you evolve as a person you also have to keep in mind that your partner is as well. Therefore, keeping a great line of communication open is helpful.
  4. Be prepared for more doors opening for the both of you. Remember when I said that society views marriage in a positive light. Well, once the I becomes a we, you will notice that a lot of more doors will open up as far as credit and companies taking you more serious. This is because society views marriage as a commitment awesomeness. So when a company sees that you are married you therefore, means that you are not afraid of commitment. In turn more doors may just open up for you.
  5. Your finances will be tested. Now this a more serious hurdle. Since most marriages fail to either infidelity and/or finances. It is especially important for you to communicate with your partner about your intentions and goals for your future. You have to make sure that both goals line up for your future in order to survive marry life.

So representation, existing as one, adjusting together, seizing opportunities, and financial goals are all important aspects of surviving that 1st year of marriage. Once you have those figured out the remaining years together are a little bit easier. Everyone does not have a fairy tale ending unless you work for it. Marriage and relationships are full time careers. If it is something you love then putting in the work won’t feel like a chore. And you will definitely love doing most things for your spouse and your well being. So if you want the amazing love story make sure you’re writing the best love story for to be told.